Hurt and pain is a part of life. But oftentimes we resist it, trying to avoid or eradicate the experience because we perceive the feeling as ‘negative’ and find it unpleasant.
For me, I’ve found that the more we resist hurt and pain, the more it persists. That when we try and manipulate our experiences (where we accept some experiences but not others), our internal struggle intensifies.
The good news is, there’s another way. While it may seem counterintuitive at first, the more we open ourselves to our full range of emotions, and all experiences in life (both the ‘positive’ and ‘negative’), the more freedom we feel within ourselves.
When we can approach life knowing that we will experience both pleasant and unpleasant sensations, we can start living more fully, even when life feels challenging. We stop trying so hard to ‘fix’ ourselves, and accept things as they are, we can step more fully into who we are.
From this space, we can create more joy and freedom within ourselves, without feeling victim to our experiences.
Throughout my own journey, I’ve found three principles that support me to let go of the internal struggle and live more fully. These are:
1. Give yourself, others, and world permission to be as they are
Accepting who you are, who others are, and the world exactly as it is right in this moment, is incredibly empowering. This is not an approach of resignation, but rather, allowing reality to be as it is (without trying to change or manipulate it). When you can recognise that life simply ‘is’ as it is (neither good nor bad), you’ll feel more in tune with life, rather than constantly fighting against it.
2. Feel all of your feelings fully
Embodying all of your feelings, whatever they may be, allows you release tension (physically, mentally and emotionally), and free up ‘space’ inside of who you are. When you welcome the full spectrum of your emotions, you give your emotions permission to flow through you, rather than getting stuck and creating a sense of inner turmoil.
3. Be open to possibility and allow yourself to receive all of life
Openess to all life has to offer (both those things you think are ‘good’ and ‘bad) helps you deepen your experiences, and live more fully. When you hold an attitude of openess, you’ll find that your mind is receptive to greater possibilities, opportunities and ideas. You’ll approach others from a place of greater kindness, compassion and care, and look upon the world with new eyes.
Looking at each of these three key principles, which one most resonates with you the most and which will you commit to integrating into your life?
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